February 28, 2012

Stop Bullying!

This momma's got a bone to pick with bullies!

Yesterday, my oldest came home and with tears in his eyes, recounted a few things that had happened at school. He tried to keep it together as he told me about the kid who shoved him into the locker {and this isn't the first time}, and then about the kid who squeezed his apple sauce all over his shoulder and then about the kid who grabbed a Sharpe and drew on the sleeve of his brand new hoodie. All in one day. It was too much for him to handle.


Q is a great kid and that's not just his mom talking. Why would someone pick on him?! He is musical, a mathlete, an athlete, an A student, and he's also an artist. He loves kids and they love him. He is the most helpful teenager I know. He is wise beyond his years!

This is the first time this year he's been picked on, last year was a whole other story. He's picked on mostly because of his size. He stands at least a foot shorter than his peers {a few inches shorter than his younger sister} but that doesn't stop him from successfully trying out, and getting on, the school Volleyball and Hockey teams. Like I said before, he is an athlete. Last year, the grade 8's and a few grade 7's would take his hat and make him jump for it, push him into lockers, etc. They thought it was funny. More of their friends would join in and soon, Q was the butt of short jokes.

He made the family dinner ~ Easy Shepherd's Pie

What makes someone bully another?! I just don't get it. I've seen it in adults as well and it just makes me blue. Why can't we celebrate our differences and all get along?! Seriously!!

This is the kid who gave up his 13th birthday and had a party to raise funds for a local shelter that helps teenagers who are on the streets. This is the kid who cuddles his little brother and comes to his sister's aide when she needs him. This is the kid who gave up his summer vacation {last year} and went on a mission's trip to Peru. This is the kid who moved out of his bedroom so another person who didn't have a home could move in. This is the kid I love so much!

Some of the stuff he raised for a local, teen, homeless shelter

I hurt when he hurts. I want to go to that school and show those kids a thing or two about respect! I will continue to push the school to honour their "Zero Tolerance" anti-bullying rules. The school said it was just boys taking things too far. I will continue to encourage him to stand up for himself and to become all he is destined to be. I will fight for him!

** My fantastic friend who writes at My Real Review let me know that tomorrow is PINK SHIRT DAY. To stop bullying, wear a pink shirt!

20 comments:

  1. Oh Shannon, I am so sorry for this to be happening to your son. My daughter has been bullied, it was always brushed off as oh the boy who was bullying her wasn't really a bully, he was just impulsive. Your son is so lucky to have a good Mama like you. He sounds like an amazing boy who will grow into an awesome man. We do hurt when they hurt, those who do pick on him are just missing out on getting to know a small boy with a big heart.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm so sorry! I know how this feels, my daughter is going through similar issues, all because she's too nice to tell on them. Keep standing up for him! That's what we can do.
    Happy w/w!
    Carolyn

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh Q- I'm so sorry kiddo that people are being jerks to you!! You are in such a tough stage of life... a lot of kids really suck at your age. But not you- you rock and please don't forget that. You have a fantastic personality and you are already so handsome and I promise you that lots of kids (especially those girls) out there won't care even a little bit about how tall you are!! They will see how awesome you are and leave those other jerks in the dust.

    And Shannon- so heartbreaking for a mama to watch. You better believe you will fight for him, I know you will. And I will be cheering you on!!

    Love you both.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Grrrr well because I don't have anything nice to say to the children I'll speak to Q. You're an amazing young man and it will be difficult at times for others to relate to you because of your maturity. Remember to be true to who you are in your responses and that God loves you first!

    ReplyDelete
  5. SOOOOO not fair :(
    He's such a wonderful kiddo!

    ReplyDelete
  6. My heart hurts just reading this. I don't know why kids can act this way. I just met one of my daughters friends mom and she said her daughter is being called "horse face" at school. Parents need to be more proactive in putting a stop to this kind of behavior with their kids. It needs to stop!

    ReplyDelete
  7. That is really horrible that Q has had to endure this at school. I really would hope that the school would enforce some form of punishment, like having the family have to pay to replace the sweater or something...Zero-Tolerance is a joke - I learned this last year with one of my kids...

    ReplyDelete
  8. I am sorry to hear this and honestly I blame the parents most of all, for not teaching their children to be kind people!!!
    Our Hope is a a petite girl and gets comments about her size still in Grade 10.

    I have always taught my kids that misery needs company and if someone is mean, please don’t ever take it to heart because they are truly sad or abused and don’t know any other way than to act out and take their unhappiness out on other people. Unfortunately I have even seen it with our oldest sweet daughter who would never want to hurt anyone either.
    I believe the thing is, to keep is perspective and make sure Q knows that it is not him but their issue, whatever it may be that makes those that bully so unhappy that they have to make someone else’s life miserable.
    I would definitely hold the school to their “Stop Bullying” policy.

    ReplyDelete
  9. So so sorry to hear how your son has been treated. No one deserves that. He sounds like a great kid!!
    My son was bullied when he was in school. I can't stand it. One of the many reasons we are homeschooling our little ones.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Oh yeah, and our school also has the anti bullying nonsense. Doesn't stop it.

    ReplyDelete
  11. I'm doing my best to teach my boys about bullying and how to be a light for others. I don't get how kids get there.I read to the kindergarten kids yesterday two books about bullying and they all talked about it and how to deal with it and how awful it is. But I know that likely one of them will be bullied and one will probably be a bully someday. How do they get there? I agree with Terri - it's less about Q and more about their unhappiness and a need to feel better by making someone else feel bad.

    Q - you're amazing. The things your Mom says about you tell us all what a great kid you are and what a great man you will be. I hope that others stand beside you and up to those who bully. And I wish that the teachers/school would step in and give consequences to those that do this. In the meantime - have faith that all will come around and in the end you'll come out shining.

    And Mom - don't let the school brush it off. Zero tolerance can't be applied when they feel like it. If that's they're policy hold them to it. It's their responsibility to uphold their policy. It's a tough place to be - you worry about interfering too much and making it worse for your child, and not doing enough to make it better. I'm hoping that things get better and fast.

    ReplyDelete
  12. I am so sorry your son is being bullied. It is horrible and shouldn't happen in the first place. My son has come home crying too. And we just don't get it. Why do kids have to be so mean?

    I hurt when my boy hurts too.

    Your son sounds like a wonderful kid and will turn out to be an amazing person.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Q is a joy and a credit to you, and it is truly horrible that he should be suffering from such nasty behaviour - and outrageous that the school is tolerating bullying in any way. Keep sticking up for him Shannon! {{{hugs}}} to you all :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. It's always the kids who are most considerate, caring and actually achieve things that get picked on I think, my niece is in the same boat and if I didn't know her I would think she was cute, smart, great artist and dances.She gets harassed because she makes friends with the kids that are picked on and not liked. Their school does not do a thing about bullying!! I told her to stand up for herself and not to let people push her around and when she did guess who was called to the principle's office, so I explained to her that this was a small part of life and when she was an adult people will appreciate her for the traits she has, but it's hard for them to understand. Your son sounds like a wonderful boy and when I hear of children like him I know we have hope for our future world which looks pretty meek at times the way some parents are and let their kids get away with everything! Make the parents of the kid pay to dry clean the hoodie, maybe they will think twice when it comes to money out of their pockets! Also tell your son all the great actors and singers are all shorter than their peers, if you take a look you will see that it's true. Lucky he has a mama like you to help him through:)

    ReplyDelete
  15. I know how you feel too :( My 14 year old daughter has the kindest, biggest heart and will be friends with anyone. She is so genuine and caring. Lately she's had a boy at school start making sexual comments to her but then tell her she would need a bag on her head. Some of the kids throw things at her during class, constantly call her names, grab her arms tightly and write things with marker, etc. Some days she comes home and I KNOW something has happened, but she won't reveal anything. She is in grade 8 and has Scoliosis, so she can't do most things as well as the rest of the kids. She also suffers from heat exhaustion, so she is limited in her activity that way as well. I guess the kids think that makes her an easy target. She stands up for herself and tells the teacher. Thankfully, she has very supportive teachers that won't tolerate it and they deal with it quickly. As far as for Q, I would go over the school's head to the school board and talk with the trustee that deals with your school. YOU WILL GET ACTION IF YOU DO THAT......I have done it before when we lived in your area and our oldest daughter had issues with bullies. He looks/sounds such a sweet boy. It's always the best kids that get targeted.....when the bullies' feel low then they have to drag everyone else down with them to make themselves feel better.........which is a sad statement

    ReplyDelete
  16. I want to know when Zero Tolerance actually means zero tolerance. It is imperative that our kids feel safe at school or everything and everyone (especially our children) suffer.

    I am sending you (((HUGS))) and please let us know what happens!

    ReplyDelete
  17. Ugh my heart goes out to him. I was bullied all through elementary school and highschool mostly for getting good grades... plus I had glasses, and didn't wear fancy clothes and dresses to school like the popular girls. Back then bullying wasn't really such a widely known topic. If I complained to anyone, it just made it worse so I tried to suck it up the best I could. But it hurt. It still hurts to think about it. Luckily nobody ever got physical with me.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Oh my blood is boiling right now. "The school said it was just boys taking things to far" WTF is the point of their damn zero tolerance policy lately. What are schools scared of the kids now? I pray I never have to deal with this as I don't know how I will remain calm and level headed. Tobei would be racing me to that school to deal with all the idiots saying it is just boys taking it to far and to deal with those childrens parents. This mama bear wants to send one nasty letter to Q's school about how they should enforce zero tolerance. I bet they would feel bullied and try to enforce it on me.

    ReplyDelete
  19. That is so unfair. What an amazing kid he is... to think that those other kids do that to him is so sad. I'm sorry you're all dealing with this.

    ReplyDelete
  20. my Q I am so sorry you are going thru this....it breaks my heart!

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for taking the time to comment!!